Friday, July 10

Hey, world.

Writing so long after anything else is making this feel like a journal. A long, empty, white expanse that I can fill my silly, pointless thoughts with.

So - who am I now?

I am most definitely a mother.

I am a fighter.

I am a lazy cleaner.

I believe in love.

I believe in fighting for what's important.

I believe in passion.

I want everyone to understand empathy and to consider the other side.

I want my children to be safe.

I want the world to turn out okay.

I want to turn off the news.

I want to cry sometimes.

A lot of the time.

I feel too much.

I understand a little too much of what people feel.

My mind is small.

The world is small.

The world is too big.

I struggle to hold on to a valid thought.

My brain has stretched and shrunk and I'm not sure what's what.

I want to make the change.

I love change.

I'm scared of change.

Dreams have become a place I go to worry, a place where my fears play themselves out.

I fear illness.

I fear death.

I want us to live forever.

I want to explore.

I want to stay home.

I want to expand.

I want to stay put.

I am 33.

33 is young!

33.

I am a wife.

I am a selfish wife.

I love endlessly.

I love whole-heartedly.

My love will never end, my love is fierce and strong and difficult.

This is difficult.